On hold...

It looks like we will have to put fertility on hold for a couple of months, at least. I had a physical done for life insurance and my liver enzymes came back extremely elevated. Since i have immunity to Hep A, that leaves B or C. (scary thought!). I have been feeling really bad lately, fatigued, hot flashes, nausea, headache, but i chalked it all up to the hormones for fertility. Obviously i was wrong. We should find out tonight what caused the elevated liver enzymes, we shall see what the problem is as to whether we can go on with fertility. I have read though that the chances are high of a baby being born to a mother with hep B or C they will contract it as well. Another scary thought is that infants who contract it will most likely devlope chronic hepitits due to the virus. Thats not good... maybe we will not be able to do it at all, which is what i am trying to keep out of my thoughts! I dont want to go there...

sick...

The past two days have not been very good. I think I caught a virus of some kind, thankfully it only lasted 24 hours. At first I thought it was the meds, but pretty sure now it was a bug. I have been able to keep food down the last two days, but nothing really sounds good at all. So its hard to figure out what to cook for dinner or even what to eat for breakfast and lunch...

I finished my clomid yesterday, went to the doctor, and I have three follicles that measure about 13mm each. I am thinking there were actually three on the right and two on the left, but she just measured three of them.

We will not be doing injections this month, just gonna use the clomid and hopefully i will ovulate on time this month and everything will work out.

Other than that, my stomach feels very tight, as the follicles grow I can start to feel my ovaries. They feel like little tennis balls on each side of my abdomen. Its strange....

So we shall see what the 14th brings our way!

Another month...another choice

So I saw the doctor last night. I was nervous, scared, dreaded going in to tell her that we were not gonna be able to do the injections this month. I was scared that she would yell at me for some reason, which is stupid because she is the nicest lady. Anyway, she seemed genuinely concerned and disappointed for me that my menses came... no prego...

She immediately started talking over with us in detail about what we do from here. She recommends laproscopy on my ovaries to remove or "clean up" the lining of them. The walls of my ovaries are very thick, and i do have several small old cycsts around the lining of the ovaries which makes ovulation hard. The eggs have a very hard time growing properly and then rupturing out of the ovary when they are this way. So the doctor said from her experience this would be a good alternative for me, along with fertility meds so increase our chances of having a healthy egg for fertilization.

She is going to contact the insurance company to see if they will approve the surgery for other reasons (not associated with infertility), we are keeping our fingers crossed that they do.

She started me on clomid again, the max dose, for 5 days. They give me a bit of a headache, but no where near as bad as last month. I get hot very quickly and sweat alot, but other than that not very many side effects. I continue taking metformin, folic acid, multi-vit, and another hormone I only take twice a week to decrease my prolactin (hormone which produces milk or lactation) which can keep you from getting prego...

I feel like a pharmacy, and I really have to keep on top of myself to take them all at the proper time. I am horrible at remembering, and even worse I will take it and forget if I have or not. I need a pil box I guess.

Anyway, I really did get quite a bit of relief from our visit to the doctor. She really makes me feel comfortable like she knows exactly what she is doing, and voices my concerns before i have even asked her... So she really seems to be in tune with what I need. Great! Its all falling into place, we shall see where it takes us.

Back to Blog

I have not posted in a long time, those 1 of you who actually read this blog know. I have not felt like doing much of anything recently, or for a month for that matter. I have a strange feeling that this blog will soon become more of a fertility (rather infertility) and my going ons of that rather than anything more. I feel the need to write down my thoughts, maybe on a day to day basis, maybe not. I think it will help. It is a very strange thing to have to go through. I find myself just now really "dealing" with it although I know it has been an issue for a long time.

So I figure it will help me to write down my emotions, thoughts, rants, and complaints to deal.
So Jack and I started seeing a fertility doctor (well ob) and started our journey in Febuary. The first month she started me just on metformin, a diabetic med, for controlling my blood sugar spikes and insulin levels, commonly a problem for patients with PCOS. This med made me very nauseous and shaky especially if I did not eat properly and a full meal before taking the med. She said that many patients will concieve just on this med alone without the need for further intervention. I had my fingers crossed but no such blessing came our way.

The second month was sort of a "test" month I guess. She started me on Clomid (pills to signal your ovaries to prepare eggs for ovulation). The Clomid worked in a way, I developed many, many eggs in my ovaries but all were very very small. So she also started me on Gonal-F injections to delay ovulation and mature the eggs further. I took 7 injections and then she gave me an HCG injection to stimulate ovulation. I did not ovulate, with lots and lots of pain in my abdomen, lots of fatigue, and just all around crappy feeling. My lower abdomen hurt like crazy, making anything, even sitting a chore. On day 20 she checked with ultrasound again to make sure I had ovulated, and had not. I had 5 eggs on my left side, and two on the right, each were more than 36mm in diameter (HUGE!). no wonder I was in pain.

Anyway, she gave me another pill to take, the hormone progesterone, and the next day I am pretty sure I finally did ovulate. I had the worst pain like someone had stabbed me in the gut on both sides right down to the bone with a huge chopping knife.

So I waited to do a pg test thinking I would wait for the symptoms and late period first before doing that. What I did not expect was to start my period on the 31st of March. I did not figure it was even due till April 4th, since I did not ovulate until the 21st. I guess I was wrong. I could not believe it. I figured that at least one of the 7 eggs would fertilize and work...

I am not super disappointed, this is only our second month. But it is very hard to wait. The meds are expensive, and it feels like a waste of money now. I took a pg test this am just to be sure before starting our next round of meds. We wont be doing the injections this month, I am kind of glad, have to look at the bright side of things and keep positive. Those injections are so painful, they burn like fire in your veins! And I am really not ready for the pain in the abdomen again for two weeks or what ever it was. But at the same time, I dont want to give up, dont want to quit, and dont want to lose hope. But I do not have much optomissim about the pills alone and no injections. We shall see what the doc says about that tonight.

So in the short of it, no baby this month... maybe next.